Friday, June 24, 2011

Stll getting over it

I am still getting over the fact that Lilly is gone. I am also having a hard time bringing myself to clean out her cage. It's just hard to imagine my life without her.

I got a package in the mail today from Snowood Vet and what was inside brought me to tears again. There was a card that was signed by both the doctors and there was also this:

Yep, those are her footprints. It made me cry all over again, but I was happy. Hopefully things will start looking up soon.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Peaceful Day

It's been a rough couple of days. Lots of tears and some laughter too. Everything that happened Tuesday couldn't have gone any better. Even though Lilly's regular doctor wasn't there. Here is how things went that day.

I got up very early that day because I couldn't really sleep that much. I mean, do you blame me? I was preparing myself for what was to come later on in the day. I was able to get some last minute pictures done and get her ready.

At 10 AM we got to the vet office where we were taken to on of the exam rooms. It was fixed up so nicely with a dim light and blanket covering the exam table. It also helped that there were 2 boxes of tissues too.

I told her that she didn't need to be afraid. She was going to be in a better place.

First she was sedated. It took full effect in about 15 minutes. During that time I was able to hold her in my arms and give her one last hug. I didn't want to let go.

The vet took her out of the room to do the euthanasia because they had to put the needle directly into the heart. It's easier that way. She took her last breath at 10:35 AM. The vet came into the room again with Lilly wrapped in a towel in a box. She looked so peaceful.

I decided to bring her home so Ginger and Oscar could say goodbye. I also wanted to bury her in my garden.

I felt bad for Oscar because he took it hard. He didn't want to leave her side. In fact, he was protecting her little body.

He watched me as I dug her grave and made sure I filled it in all the way. Then he did something strange. He went and laid on the grave for about 5 minutes.

Once she was buried Oscar went back to being his normal self. I really think he needed that time to say goodbye. That's why I love him.

I am going to miss Lilly so much but I know that she is waiting for me on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge. Until then, she will get to spend her time playing and having fun without anymore pain. I also know that Heavenly Father will take good care of my baby girl for me. I can feel her around me, watching over me.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

The last hour

As I sit her writing this, I can't help but remember all the good times I have had with Lilly. Yes, she could be stubborn sometimes and mean to the other girls, but she is mine forever.

I first saw her on Craigslist back in August of 2007. The parents had bought her for their daughter, who lost interest in Lilly after 1 year. I was looking for a companion for Ginger because he had been very depressed since my first Guinea Pig Zoe passed unexpectedly. From the moment our eyes met I knew she was mine. There was no doubt about it. Ginger fell in love with her instantly too, so I guess is really was meant to be.

She had lived be herself for the first year of her life, so she had to get used to living with a companion. The first week was a rough one. I didn't trust her with Ginger yet so they could only get playtime together. Lilly was NOT happy. She hated Ginger coming near her and would try to bite him. I wasn't sure if it was ever going to work out but I was not going to give up. After a week I finally put them in the cage together full time and it has worked out great. Those two have been stuck together like glue (mostly Ginger to Lilly).

About a year ago I got 2 female Skinny Pigs(hairless Guinea Pigs)So that they could become Lilly's new companions when Ginger died. He is getting old and I wanted her to get used to them while he was still alive. I never in my life thought it would be the other way around. Ginger just keeps going and going (much like the Energizer Bunny). Thankfully he will still have the girls by his side.

I am closing in on the last hour with my sweet little girl Lilly and I am brought to tears, both of joy and sadness. Joy because she will finally be going to heaven and will be in no more pain. She is going to wait for me there until that day when I will be with her once again. Sadness because I am going to miss her greatly. Every time I get up in the morning she always wanted me to give her food, but that will be no more.

I can hear her labored breathing and I know she is still alive, but only just. She is ready to be with her Heavenly Father again. She is ready to let go, but am I?

Monday, June 20, 2011

Enjoying the last 24 hours

I am trying to keep a brave face on but I haven't been able to keep my emotions straight. I have realized that the time I have been dreading has come. It's time to let Lilly go....

Last night she didn't want to eat at all, but I knew she had to eat something. I fed her through a syringe because that is the only way I could get her to take anything. She didn't come out of her house once last night. It is time. I'm glad I have my mom as a shoulder to cry on. She took pictures of us both together and it was not easy for her to get a picture with me smiling.

I was hoping that she could wait until Friday or Saturday because those are my days off. She has her own plans. She is telling me that it's time to let go. When I got to work today I told my boss that I wouldn't be able to work tomorrow and explained why. It's not something I want to do (especially with the car needing to be fixed, I could use the extra money)but it's something that I need to do. I can't go into work tomorrow a wreck, plus I will be crying a lot too.

I need all the hugs I can get right now...

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Puppy Pictures

I was going though some old pictures and I found some of Oscar when he was just 6 weeks old. The breeder I got him from sent me a few pictures of him before I even brought him home. He was so cute! He doesn't look like the same dog either.

Oscar at 6 weeks

Oscar at 6 years

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

When will it end?

Besides dealing with a dying animal, I am also having trouble with my car. It all started last Thursday after I went to Country Village with Xander. After we left there, I was going to take him to Alderwood Mall but the car went dead while I was waiting in the turn lane on Bothell-Everett Highway. Luckily it started again and I was able to turn around and make it back to the house. The next day I took the car to the machanic but it wouldn't do it for them. I was so mad! Even the car's computer showed that there was nothing wrong with the car. I have to take it in again sometime this week. I'm hoping to do it Thursday because I have the day off.
When will all this drama end?

Friday, June 10, 2011

Hard Times

These last few days have been a little hard to handle. I'm not really sure how I am getting through them.

I had a follow up visit for Lilly at the Vet on Tuesday and it didn't go great. Lilly has Lymphoma and will not be getting better. It was crushing news...although I kind of expected it. The Vet is not sure how long she has left, but I will know when it is time to euthanize her. Most animals with cancer don't die on their own, they just get worse. So now I am just enjoying the time I have left with her and spoiling her a little too.

Here she is at the exam room waiting for the vet to come.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Fun night in Mukilteo

Last night I went with Louis, his parents, his niece, and his nephew over to Mukilteo because it was such a beautiful day. There were no clouds in the sky and it was great to finally see some real sunshine. So, the beach was the perfect place to go for the evening. We had dinner before we left his house and ice cream later. I took both my cameras with me and I used my Nikon D90 while Louis got to use my Nikon P500. We both had a lot of fun taking pictures of the beach, the sunset, his niece and nephew. and each other. I haven't loaded them all onto the laptop yet so her are just a few.

Here I am snapping a picture of a seagull.

Here is a boat coming in during the beautiful sunset.